Scumbag me

As usual, with 2 papers in the upcoming 3 days, I am overcome with a sudden urge to blog  rather than do what I ought to really be doing– STUDY!!! hahaha! Classic scumbag brain.

Really can’t wait for Wednesday! Can’t wait to step out of the exam hall with a flourish for the LAST time ever.

It’s been 4 years in NUS Business School. It’s not that  long, but somehow it feels a lot longer than the four years in secondary school. It’s the sharpest transition because it is a move from the sheltered life of a student to the workplace, where I guess my performance is no longer a pure function of my individual inputs. I remember feeling no dilemma moving from RGPS to Crescent, and from Crescent to Hwa Chong. They were easy decisions. I basically went where was convenient (hate travelling and waking up early), or followed where my friends went. #simpleminded.

I like this quote from one of my fav Harry Potter books. Can’t remb the exact one but it went something like this: “In the end, (Harry) just picked all the classes that Ron picked. He though that, even if he ended up being rubbish at them, at least he will have someone friendly with him.” Really true. Cue Financial Modeling.

Unfortunately, I can’t seem to do that now! I have 2 months to seriously think of what I want to do, alone. I need to sit down and work out my finances too, having committed to my first capital investment early this year. I REALLY NEED to get my drivers’ license too. I guess all in all, fear and uncertainty aside, I am so excited that the future is in my own hands.

Now I can only wish SC1101E and GEM2901 will get out of my hair quickly. Eiks.

 

#Fuckyeah

TWO MORE WEEKS TO END OF SCHOOL…

 

FOREVER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

#Fuckyeah!

reflection

Who is that girl I see
Staring straight, back at me?
Why is my reflection someone
I don’t know?
Somehow I cannot hide
Who I am, though I’ve tried
When will my reflection show
Who I am inside?

I’ve been feeling really listless and uncertain lately- about life in the future, about what I want, even about what I feel. Is it fatigue? or just a brief passing of deadened emotions? We often find ourselves so entrenched in the past and attached to the present. But what about the future? No one knows what is in the future. It is but a projection of my own judgement, my ideals.

Giving up is always terrifying.

Keep Calm

Need to keep calm and carry on.

Need to remember that there are more important things in life.

Need to remember that evil people always exist.

Need to be grateful that things aren’t worse.

Breathe, breathe.

December has got to be the most AWESOME month in the entire year.

I have been enjoying myself everyday doing things that I want to do!!! Waking up late, reading the papers, chilling with my cat, catching up with friends… the feeling is just awesome

1st Dec was a landmark day because we finally completed and concluded our 1 year consulting practicum. Troy and I were tasked to print and submit the final outputs and we were so goddamn HAPPY  that we went to binge and eat our hearts out at Seoul Garden. I swear the weather looked so lovely and everything tasted delicious because it was such a FCKING happy day!

3 booklets of blood and sweat

doesn't look like much right but WHOA, you're so wrong

I felt so liberated with exams and CP over and everything so I decided  I needed a change. I think I went abit over and got a really short haircut and super look like a boy now. It gave ck a shock hahahah! He left me at the salon and went to walk around and when he came back, his girlfriend became a boyfriend!! haha.

I love it although I look slightly alarming. Its just so liberating to have short hair.

I’m also gg for LASIK next week yay! Although I’m seriously a little bit scared thinking about how the doctor is going to invade my eyeballs, I’m quite assured to know that the surgery is only about fifteen minutes and the downtime is only like one day?! Technology is so advanced now!! The whole surgery is blade-less and using laser, they will just make a flap on the cornea, laser off a specified layer to correct your degree, close the flap back and that’s it! Sounds easy right! I’m so excited!

Can’t wait to have clear vision again (: I hate wearing glasses and contact lens makes my eyes red all the time so I usually rather go without any and am half blind all the time /: Now I can finally see people’s faces clearly!

Four weeks left before school reopens. Too soon man ):

I really need people to take UEs/GEMS with (I have to take 4!!) so please jio me if you are taking any easy ones!!

Suppose.

Suppose that I missed you
Suppose that I cared
And suppose that I’ve spent all my nights running scared
And suppose that I was never there

And my eyes are screaming for the sight of you
And tonight I’m dreaming
Of all the things that we’ve been through
And I can’t hold on to you, so I guess I feel lonely too

Suppose we were happy, suppose it was true
And suppose there were cold nights
But we somehow made it through
And suppose that I’m nothing without you

And my eyes are screaming for the sight of you
And tonight I’m dreaming
Of all the things that we’ve been through
And I can’t hold on to you, so I guess I feel lonely too

Slow way down
This breakdown’s eating me alive
And I’m tired
And this fight is fighting to survive

Tell me a secret
Tell me a story
I’ll listen attentively
I’ll stay awake all night

Allow me to whisper
There’s nothing I did mean
But it’s in my body, it’s strong enough to fight
Please help me make this right

Suppose that I was wrong
Suppose you were here
And suppose that I reached out and caught your tears
And suppose this fight just disappeared

And my eyes are screaming for the sight of you
And tonight I’m dreaming
Of all the things that we’ve been through
And I can’t hold on to you, so I guess I feel lonely too
But I’d rather be here with you

Suppose; Secondhand Serenade

X.

The past like some unquiet ghost still moves
Within, too fraught with longing to forget.
We have moved on, as is mature and wise.
But love, though long abandoned, never dies.

The past like some unquiet ghost still moves,
Within, too fraught with longing to forget
I miss those days, it plays in heart of mine
But they, now gone forever, lost in time.